In a State of Musk! Oh God that feels good... Written to the sounds of the "Girl from Ipanema."

2010-08-14T00:43:00.000-07:00

My anger is back. The power… the bliss… adrenaline… I'm alive… I can breath again. It clears my head. My wife doesn't understand so I avoid her. My friends, specifically the new ones, absolutely know I need help. I don't need any help, man. I don't need anything but to be left alone. And if you come close physically or mentally, I will walk away. I don't want to hurt you, or me. I'm not in my twenties anymore. In my 60's now I can easily hurt myself if I loose control. Don't want that, now do we?

An elephant in musk best describes the feeling. Animosity, hatred is not a part of this high. People make the mistake of thinking differently, and indeed, guys in this state tend to fight and lash out in seemingly dumb / excessive ways. And forget it if you get a buzz on. That is stupid and frankly ruins a good time, every time. Teenagers do this. Their life is new. They have no idea, and most adult guys have been female-ized, or family-burdened to understand, let alone appreciate this male emotion. I think some criminals enjoy this power yet they can't keep it out of the dark side.

It took me 40 or 50 years to finally understand the joy of "in a state of musk." Oh man, it's the nexus, i.e., once you finally "get it" you want it all the time -- like this evening as I write. Wanting it all the time would also be stupid. Musk is best not shared and not stayed in for too long. Stay there, add a chemical and whamo! …instant criminal of the worse kind. I'm sure glad I finally understand this.

So you ask, "What triggers a state of musk?" Like I said, one should not have alcohol. That is probably the most common trigger, yet that chemical brings with it, evil. Trust me: been there, done that, not fun. I actually fear -- and I do mean fear -- ever getting there by accident. If you are one of my friends and for some reason you just happen to be around if this happens. Please stand by and be ready to take me down. I will be in denial. Don't trust anything I say. Please stop me.

Certain incidences may also trigger it yet these are usually associated with hatred, and you don't what that either. There are others, but the ones that kick my ass into gear are the deep passions associated with inequities or music. And the outward sign that I have become aware of is a sharp rise in tactile sensitivity. My skin starts to burn… in a very sensual way. And then odors and sounds rage… and oh yeah, I'm there, man. And then, oh yeah, bring it. I will win or gleefully destroy myself trying. No pain!

Like I said above, I am in musk right now. I'm controlled… no chemicals, music in my earphones. There were several triggers that happened throughout the day. Little by little it built. I could feel it coming on, and I didn't want to stop it. In fact I slid into it all day as it built and then maintained. Add some smooth jazz and writing all day and wow. The anger was nice and even all day.

What's it like? Okay, it's like your first four beers or half a pint of your favorite. You're into a buzz but you can still think. You may be able to have anger without the need for action, but with alcohol I doubt it. This is not musk… you're just drunk… but you get the idea. With musk, remove the alcohol, keep and enjoy the anger and add bliss… incredible intensity… and then look for a fight. Or, if you understand and appreciate its power, you control it, enjoy its warmth and clarity and nobody will know… if you stay quiet.

2010-04-21T08:14:00.000-07:00

Fear: "To be afraid or feel anxious or apprehensive about a possible or probable situation or event."

I hear talk of violence by right wing radicals. Of course, there is little concern about violent left wing radicals. Left wing violence always happens as the left feels that they own the right to protest and act violently. But when right-thinking people protest, such as the Tea Party groups, the media talk of violence and hate speech, and race, etc.

Within the subject is talk of actions that kill and destroy. The other day, former President Clinton lectured us on this subject. This is not the first time he's done as such, Bill O'Rielly points out. Clinton shakes his finger at his audience, scolding them to be careful. His words are towards the right-thinkers, not the left as I stated above. Leaders of the left do this all the time. There are those who keep track of such scolding.

In the news are stories of right-wing groups being picked up, right-wing bloggers that broadcast hate, and generally the obvious right-wing violent and hatred voices. We are told that hate talk will urge certain individuals to violence.

So what's my point? Those that broadcast hatred and violence are easy to spot and track. Yes, be concerned, but those are not the ones who will be successful. The ones to fear are the ones you do not know about. These individuals appear normal and would pass almost any level of scrutiny. They write nothing. They talk to no one about their feelings or plans. They are invisible until they act, and they will act. The left need fear these people.

Any and all who choose to be known as left wing, who rail against the United States in favor of a more European model, who rule, control and blog with their left hand, need to fear those individuals who have mastered the camouflage of effective assignation.

Left wingers, listen up. Am I to fear? Your best evidence is that I speak publicly, thus no. Well, kind of no. Don't fear me. Fear those that display no outward feelings, words or actions. Inside, they plot to one day provide you with an attitude adjustment. And no, you will not be able to defend against their plans, you won't see them coming, but if you're lucky you will live to appreciate their attention to detail. And then you still might not know whom they are, leaving them to reload.

Should the left fear? Yes. If you feel like someone is staring at you, you're right. Someone is not only staring at you they are plotting.

Should everyone who is left-bent fear. For the most part, yes. Even though you feel insignificant as a left-thinking individual, someone who knows of you does not like you and is plotting. Is that fair? Yeah … from their point of view. So fear. You need to be fearful.

Some people, of course, are more targets then you. These are, generally speaking, those out side governmental employment. These include the heads of certain organizations, certain people in the media, select bloggers and activists. They need to start fearing, to take fear seriously. They need to fear, now.

Zoomie's View

In a State of Musk! Oh God that feels good... Written to the sounds of the "Girl from Ipanema."